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COTA 2019
IN THE SUZUKI GARAGE…
RINS: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHAHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! Please tell Valentino I am sorry. I like the chicanes. Um, and I will need a ladder to get down from the roof of the pit garage.
MIR: I hate you. Prick. I’ve shit in your coffin.
IN THE YAMAHA GARAGE…
VINALES: How many penalties did I get? You said to ride through some things. I ride in the penalty corner. Then I ride through the pits. Maybe next time you want me to ride through the grandstand? I will ride through your mother too.
ROSSI: Allora, this Rins boy with the funny head makes the good race. He make the better race than me, and I make a very good race. He is now waiting to say sorry to me. I will make him wait. Tell him I am busy, Uccio. Allora, Marquez also make the good race. In fact, I think Marquez make the best race. HAHAHA!
MORBIDELLI: Did the Boss beat me? Oh thank God.
IN THE DUCATI GARAGE…
MILLER: Get that up yas! Fucken smashed it. And it wasn’t even wet. Well, it was wet a bit on the seat. It’s like I sprung a leak out me arse a bit. Fucken place is like a motocross track, aye? Ya get the weave on, and it’s buckin’ like a ute hittin’ a table-drain full of rabbits. Goes off and I shat meself a bit. You seeing this, Geegee? You wanna be stocking the esky up with beer, mate. Get rid of that bloody piss-vino Paytroocho sinks. Prick will be chasin’ Bowteester next year in WSBK. Make Rea really crazy.
PETRUCCI: You gave me Lorenzo’s bike, didn’t you? With his seat? Why are you throwing away my vino?
DOVIZIOSO: Fifth is OK. Fifth is better than gravel. Cal is very upset again. I will send him some chocolates and a new CD of happy Italian music.
IN THE APRILIA GARAGE…
IANNONE: Look how fast I ride this slow merda you give me to ride! I ride it a little bit like Belen rides me. Like a wild cow she is.
ALEIX ESPARGARO: Oh good. Things have become even more shit than before. Now I have to watch Iannone dancing in his underpants. And he doesn’t wear underpants. Bastard can dance though. He has some moves. Stop yelling at me in Italian!
IN THE HONDA GARAGE…
MARQUEZ: Please stop crying, Alberto. Is OK. I make the little mistake. I fall asleep a little bit at the front, then I think of my girlfriend and how she looks in the new underpants I buy for her, and then I look a little bit at the sky, and then I see earth, then sky, then earth, then sky, the gravel, then underpants. Why does George want to buy the polar bear?
LORENZO: Poo-eegah needs to bond with the polar bear. He needs the comfort of his people. Maybe then he will stop giving me the rubbish to ride and then I can win the championship. Or maybe the polar bear will eat him. I do not care at this stage.
CRUTCHLOW: Yeah, well fuck that and fuck you too. I had Rossi. I fucken had him by the throat and then all the fucken shit went to fucken shit. It’s not my fucken fault. I think it’s that Spencer twat. He’s put the crash-curse on me from the last race when he got upset by my balancing. I hate those old farts and their rules and shit. Bring me a fresh crocodile! This one is broken!
IN THE KTM GARAGE
POL ESPARGARO: No, I do not speak Austrian. Even when you yell I do not understand. I do not know what you want. No, there is nothing wrong with me. I do not have a disease. My face always looks like this. My sister, Aleix, she is the one with the disease.
SYAHRIN: Yes, I am last again. But that is OK. If it was WSBK, I would be second or first if Alvaro falls off.
